


The Confession

by redshu



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2019-04-13 17:09:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14117013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redshu/pseuds/redshu
Summary: I am nothing without you, Lee Daehwi. Because of you, I became so much brighter. So much better. So much braver. I am no longer the reserved boy who kept all his secrets to himself. The skeletons in the closet, they are non existent now. I have come out of the closet, just for you. But I am afraid. Afraid to lose you. You are the most important person in my life. You cannot leave me. Or else, I have no reason to live.





	The Confession

**Author's Note:**

> Jinhwi.

"Princess! You're taking really long in the shower. Please hurry up! There are still three people after you. It's already midnight!" Jisung complained, banging on the bathroom door at the first floor of their apartment. The banging continued for a while, before it finally stopped.

 

"Sorry Jisung-hyung...," Daehwi whispered, so softly that Jisung would not be able to hear him.

 

Daehwi had been in the shower for forty-five minutes. Usually, he would be changing into his pyjamas by now. But today, he was still standing under the shower.

 

"Hwi! Don't pour soap on the floor! You'll trip and fall!"

 

"Hwi-ah~ look at those bubbles! Whoa~! Look how huge they are!"

 

"Hwi, who loves you the most?"

 

"Daddy!” The word had escaped Daehwi's mouth unintentionally.

 

Pearl-shaped tears rolled down his cheeks from his usual wide luminous eyes, leaving no smears or streaks as they get washed away by the stream of water. Daehwi flashed a painful smile for a second, when the next stream of tears flowed down his cheeks.

 

Today, he had encouraged a fan to say "I Love You" to her father who was working overseas. Because, you may never know when it is too late. Daehwi did not get a chance to say his final goodbye before he never saw his father again.

 

He clasped his hands together and closed his eyes. Silently, he made a short prayer.

 

_Daddy, I hope that you are doing well over there. Eat lots of good food, have lots of fun, and receive lots of love. Because, you deserve all that._

 

He opened his eyes and finished washing that last section of soap on his hair.

 

 _Hopefully, it reaches him_ , Daehwi thought.

 

He finally opened the door after getting dressed, only to be greeted with a frowning Jihoon and his noisy companion, Woojin.

 

"Princess, what the hell were you doing in the shower for so long?" Jihoon exclaimed, his eyebrows furrowing as he crossed his arms.

 

"I was putting on some make up and trying to fit in that pink tutu dress that Jihoon-hyung gave me. I look good right?" Woojin answered in a super high pitched voice, doing a little ballet dance of some sort. His huge cheeky smile was greeted with the palm of his pink-obsessed friend.

 

"Shut up, you sausage," Jihoon said as he shot him an annoyed look.

 

"So, what took you so long?" Jihoon had turned back to Daehwi and asked again. While his face had visibly showed annoyance, his tone of voice wasn’t that fierce. It seemed more like he wanted to know the answer rather than he wanted to scold him.

 

"I was-" Daehwi mumbled, his head immediately turning to the side towards the voice that had cut him off.

 

"Daehwi! You're finally out!" Jinyoung, who was walking past them, cut Daehwi's answer before he could reply. He walked towards them while flashing his signature 'Daehwi is beside me, I am happy' smile.

 

Seeing the cute boy with the fabric wrapped around his small head made him so tempted to kiss him.

 

"Daehwi-ah you look so adorable with this towel over your head. Aigoo~" Jinyoung exclaimed as he walked towards Daehwi, patting his head as if he was his pet dog.

 

Smiley Jinyoung was staring at the not-so-smiley Daehwi when he suddenly realized that something was wrong.

 

"Daehwi-ah! Why are your eyes so red?!" Jinyoung exclaimed, his smile turning into a frown almost immediately, “are you okay?!”

 

 Jinyoung cupped Daehwi's face with his warm palms and looked all around his face. He then looked straight into his eyes.

 

"Daehwi?" Jinyoung asked in a soft tone. Daehwi's gaze however, was avoiding Jinyoung's.

 

Seeing that Daehwi was not answering him, Jinyoung got even more anxious.

 

"Lee Daehwi! Look into my fucking eyes!" He yelled.

 

Daehwi slowly did as he was told.

 

"Have you been crying?" Jinyoung asked, his voice genuine, concerned and urgent.

 

Daehwi removed Jinyoung’s hands away from his face.

 

"It's okay, I'm fine," Daehwi cried, walking back to his room.

 

"What the hell do you mean you're fine?" Jinyoung argued, but Daehwi did not answer.

 

Jinyoung turned back, seeing only Woojin at the doorway.

 

"Jihoon went in already, while you both were talking. Go check up on him, not just to ensure that he's fine, but to make sure that you are fine too because you obviously don't look fine to me now," Woojin said while tapping on his shoulder.

 

Jinyoung nodded.

 

//

 

"Daehwi? Daehwi, are you okay?" Jinyoung looked at him while closing the glass door of the balcony of their apartment. His face was already a squashed tomato which would crumble if a word from Daehwi triggered it.

 

Daehwi was standing at the other end of the balcony, back-facing Jinyoung.

 

"I'm fine. Thanks for your concern, Bae Jinyoung," he replied softly, but he made sure that it was still loud enough for Jinyoung to hear it.

 

"Should I stay?" Jinyoung asked, already expecting Daehwi's answer to be no.

 

Knowing Daehwi's stubborn personality, he would rather suffer alone without depending on anyone else. But this time, Jinyoung will not care anymore. He wants to be there for Daehwi.

 

"It's okay, I'm fine, I'm really fine," Daehwi repeated, trying his best to sound convincing.

 

However, Jinyoung could hear the slight sniffling sound, how he was choking back tears.

 

"Okay," Jinyoung uttered, glancing into the living room through the glass door to check that no one had paid much attention to the both of them being at the balcony.

 

They stood at their spots in silence for a while.

 

Daehwi, expecting Jinyoung to turn around and leave the balcony, wiped away his tears using the back of his hands and turned around.

 

Greeted with the sharp, manga character-like eyes of the one he knew, he quickly swung back to face away from Jinyoung.

 

 _Why didn't he leave?!_ Daehwi screamed inside as he was scrambling around in his brain to search for an excuse to push Jinyoung away. He brainstormed for a while but decided that the truth would be the best excuse out of this situation.

 

_Fuck it, whatever. I shall just admit to crying then, it's not like there's anything wrong with crying._

 

Daehwi swung back, all ready to face Jinyoung and answer his burning questions.

 

What he was not expecting was that Jinyoung was no longer at the other end of the balcony, but now right in front of him, his face barely inches away from Daehwi's.

 

The younger guy immediately looked down, his cheeks burning hot.

 

 _Now what should I do?_ Daehwi panicked.

 

He bit his lip, eyebrows furrowing as he thought hard for a proper excuse to get away from this awkward position in front of Jinyoung.

 

What greeted him in response was instead, a warm embrace.

 

Jinyoung wrapped his muscular arms around Daehwi's petite frame and hugged him tightly.

 

He could smell the light fragrance of Jinyoung's favourite cologne, the one that Daehwi had picked for him because it smelled mysterious, just like him.

 

He could hear the soft sounds of Jinyoung's breathing as air rushed in, out, in, out of his lungs.

 

He could feel the warmth of Jinyoung's touch, reassuring him that everything would be okay.

 

It's Bae Jinyoung, the Bae Jinyoung he loves. A lot.

 

Naturally, his arms reached to hug Jinyoung. Feeling Daehwi's hands on his back, Jinyoung hugged him even more tightly.

 

"Daehwi-ah, it's okay to cry. If you're sad, just cry. But don't be sad, because I'll be sad together with you. Be happy, the happy Daehwi is the Daehwi I love," Jinyoung mentioned.

 

Daehwi could feel Jinyoung's cheekbones rising as he made that statement, seemingly pleased with what he had said. He ran through Jinyoung’s words once again.

 

'Daehwi-ah, it's okay to cry.' _Okay noted, I was going to say that too,_ Daehwi thought. 'If you're sad, just cry.' _Okay that makes sense,_ Daehwi agreed. 'Don't be sad, because I'll be sad together with you.' _I will try okay, Bae Jinyoung,_ Daehwi nodded. 'Be happy, the happy Daehwi is the Daehwi I love.' Yes, being happy would be great, so that...WAIT. The Daehwi I love? Wait what?!

 

Daehwi instantly lifted up his head to look at Jinyoung. Jinyoung shot him a surprised look, since they were hugging happily and Daehwi shocked face basically broke the momentum.

 

"Repeat that last sentence again?" Daehwi asked, raising a finger to point at Jinyoung.

 

"Happy Daehwi is the Daehwi I love? That one?" Jinyoung asked, raising an eyebrow while a wide grin was plastered on his face.

 

"What? Bae Jinyoung, what do you mean by 'the Daehwi I love'?" Daehwi questioned, confused at his words.

 

If he was just a friend, they would have just laughed it off together. Friends do love each other.

 

But the vibes he had got from Jinyoung all these while seemed nothing like the friendly kind of love. It was more than that.

 

Maybe it was just him thinking too much, him being affected by Jinyoung’s actions but then again, nothing else can justify why Jinyoung treats him this way. Different from all the other members. Nothing like his childhood best friend. Daehwi felt special, but he wasn’t sure.

 

Those simple words got his heart pounding fast, his head a little dizzy and he needs clarification. All this time, Jinyoung seems to be giving him more than a friend would.

 

He wanted to ask, but Jinyoung had opened his mouth first.

 

"I mean...you are someone special to me. And I love you more than an ordinary friend should. Maybe you would have sensed it or maybe you did not, but I...had feelings for you since the start. You were just different from the rest of the guys. Like a sky full of stars, but there's only one shining brightly. And that's you," Jinyoung said, as his heart was beating wildly as if it malfunctioned.

 

He had always contemplated about letting Daehwi know about how he feels because he was afraid of how Daehwi would react.

 

Today however, he decided that they should take things further. He felt that spilling his feelings to an emotional Daehwi would be safer.

 

"Did you just confess to me?" Daehwi shot him a surprised look. He never expected Jinyoung to read his thoughts like a book, telling him everything, the words he had wanted to hear, the confirmation he had needed since the time he fell for him.

 

"Mmm hmm. Lee Daehwi. I love you," Jinyoung said, and Daehwi blushed even more. He did not know how to react.

 

"Ever since you smiled at me when we practiced for the 'Pick Me' dance, I knew you were different. I almost missed the opportunity to get to know you, talk to you, smile together with you and love you, if not for the fact that you picked me to join you for the first evaluation performance. From then until now, these few months. There was not once that I did something without thinking about you. I am eternally thankful that you entered my life, the life of a boring and unconfident boy. And raised me up to be someone proud of his work, confident of what he's doing, a member of WannaOne." Jinyoung continued with a smile, "And I learnt how difficult it was to hide my feelings for someone for so long. How to love someone so close yet so far from me."

 

Jinyoung raised his hands to cup Daehwi's cheek, which was warm, as Daehwi got flustered at this sudden confession. He looked at Daehwi sincerely before he continued.

 

"Lee Daehwi," Jinyoung said firmly, "be my boyfriend."

 

Daehwi looked at Jinyoung for a moment and Jinyoung nodded.

 

"Huh?" Daehwi blurted out, unsure of how to respond to that.

 

He was always envious of other couples, they could hold hands, kiss and even sleep with each other, but he could not do all that with Jinyoung. Because he was unsure. Unsure if Bae Jinyoung liked him back that way. His actions were always so ambiguous, it could be considered as affection for a younger brother or a best friend. Spending lots of time together was good, but it did not mean that Bae Jinyoung loved him. All he hoped for was to love Jinyoung beside him, even if he did not receive the love back. Now hearing his confession, face to face, Daehwi basically got what he had wished for. And much more.

 

After all those thoughts ran through his mind, Daehwi made a cute face, his eyes widened for a second and he pouted cutely. He looked at Jinyoung, who was smiling like a sunshine. The sunshine in his life.

 

"Lee Daehwi, you're making it so fucking obvious what your response is," Jinyoung chuckled.

 

He knew that if Daehwi was just standing there, keeping quiet and making a random cute face, it meant that he was embarrassed. If not, he would have got angry almost immediately if he was unwilling.

 

"Did I get caught?" Daehwi said in a sweet voice.

 

"Mhm," Jinyoung agreed. His heart warmed up knowing that Daehwi had accepted his feelings, a smile stuck to his face since just now.

 

"Whatever," Daehwi gushed as he wrapped his arms around Jinyoung, and of course, Jinyoung hugged him back tightly. He succeeded!

 

As they pulled away, Jinyoung mentioned, "oh yeah, I forgot to give you something."

 

He flashed the biggest smile that Daehwi had ever seen in his life.

 

"What thing?" Daehwi asked, confusion clearly shown on his face.

 

"This," Jinyoung answered.

 

He leaned forward and lowered his head so that his lips could touch Daehwi's. Ignoring Daehwi's widely opened eyes and gaping mouth, he continued tasting the fruity strawberry flavour lip balm on Daehwi's lips. The gaping mouth had in fact, made it easier for him.

 

After sucking every drop of lip balm flavour from Lee Daehwi's lips, Jinyoung finally pulled away.

 

"Lee Daehwi, was this our first kiss?" he asked cheekily.

 

//

 

"Jisung-hyung, can you figure out what he's saying?" A curious voice popped up behind Jisung.

 

By now, several members have crowded around the glass door which had a clear view of the balcony, and of course, the lovebirds.

 

Jisung, the king of gossip was second to reach, after the queen of gossip Sungwoon passed by and happened to see what the two were doing. This gossip couple was making so much noise that Woojin and Jihoon went to crowd around the glass as well, with Guanlin joining in the fun at the back.

 

"Must be something along the lines of ‘I think we just shared a kiss’ I think," Jisung replied almost immediately. He could not hear what the two were saying behind those thick glass doors, but based on his 26 years of life experience, he was sure of his guess.

 

"Whoa Bae Jinyoung, that was smooth! HAHAHAHA!" Woojin cracked up, proud of his younger friend.  He remembered sharing a conversation with Jinyoung about Daehwi before, and Jinyoung was constantly talking about Daehwi as if he was already his boyfriend.

 

Now it seems like Bae Jinyoung actually managed to become his real boyfriends.

 

"Hey, Park Woojin! Don't block me, I want to see!" Jihoon, who was tip-toeing, got rather fed up that Woojin's big head was the main view of the balcony.

 

"Who asked you to be shorter than me and slower? Too bad, I got here first," Woojin chanted.

 

"Shut up, you sausage!" Jihoon scowled, making a cute annoyed face, similar to that of an angry cat.

 

"Who asked you not to be a Guanlin? He's standing behind and he can still see," Woojin argued back.

 

"Hey!" Jihoon's palm was out, all ready to give Woojin a tight slap for his nonsense, when Jaehwan's laughter interrupted them.

 

"HAHAHHAHAHAHA," That creepy and amazingly loud laughter broke the argument. He was watching his favourite variety show with Minhyun, the two of them cuddled up on the couch and stuffing themselves with popcorn.

 

Jisung turned back to look at them.

 

"Jaehwan-ah! Keep quiet, I don't want those lovebirds to see us here," Jisung requested.

 

"Okay, okay!" Jaehwan replied, with his catchphrase.

 

So back to the lovebirds.

 

//

 

"Bae Jinyoung! What did you just do?" Daehwi scowled, trying hard to appear angry at what Jinyoung did. However, in actual fact, he loved it. He loved it so much that his face was glowing red hot, just like heated copper.

 

"Sorry, I could not control myself because you looked so cute, with those rosy cheeks of yours," Jinyoung replied, throwing Daehwi off. In response, Daehwi grabbed his adorably red cheeks as if they need to be further heated up.

 

"Aigoo, my Daehwi~ Are you getting embarrassed with what I just said?" Jinyoung then used his pinkie finger to hook onto the pinkie on Daehwi's left hand. He took this opportunity to interlock the rest of his fingers with Daehwi's, such that Daehwi's left hand was fully surrounded by his warm touch.

 

By then, Daehwi could not think straight anymore. With Jinyoung confessing to him and tempting every fiber of his body to just stick to him like the opposite poles of a magnet, Daehwi just wanted... to be stuck to Jinyoung like super glue. One that was irreversible. He wanted to be never torn apart from Bae Jinyoung.

 

Sensing that Jinyoung was staring sweetly at him, Daehwi did not dare to look up.

 

However, using his right hand, he drew imaginary circles around the back of Jinyoung's left hand, still tightly interlocked with his. There were so many thoughts rushing through Daehwi's mind. He did not know where to start. How to begin. How to say. What to say.

 

All the thoughts that had went through his mind, how was he going to let Bae Jinyoung know about it?

 

Jinyoung was shooting hearts from his eyes at the top of Daehwi's head, until Daehwi finally spoke.

 

"Jinyoung-hyung," he uttered.

 

"Hm?" Jinyoung replied, with a tone soft and fluffy that made Daehwi’s heart melt like ice cream.

 

"I have something to say. To you," he continued.

 

"Hm?"

 

Daehwi finally looked up at Jinyoung.

 

The moment their eyes met, Jinyoung could see the sparkle in Daehwi's eyes, reflecting the night light from the lamp post beside them. Not to mention those adorable uneven eyelids of his, it was what Daehwi was unconfident about, but that was what Jinyoung felt was most unique about how his precious Daehwi looked. Everything about his looks that Daehwi was unconfident about, Jinyoung embraced them. They made him the Lee Daehwi whom he love.

 

Daehwi raised up their interlocked hands, such that it was in Jinyoung’s view.

 

He then looked down at their hands, and silently told himself, let's start.

 

Next, he lifted up his free index finger and started tracing some words on the back of Jinyoung's hand. 'Bae…Jin…Young' Daehwi traced, one word after another. Jinyoung could recognise the tracing of his name almost instantly, because of how his mother used to do that when he was younger, just for fun.

 

'I' Daehwi wrote. 'Love' followed, as Jinyoung's eyes were fixed on his hand, virtually tracing his finger with his eyes. 'You'. He ended off with a poke on Jinyoung's hand, as if it was a full stop.

 

Bae Jinyoung let out a soft smile. Yes, Daehwi would do such cute things. My Lee Daehwi would do such things.

 

"Eh, no," Lee Daehwi blurted out a second later.

 

Eh, no? _What was Lee Daehwi thinking?_ Jinyoung did not have a chance to ask because Daehwi clarified a second later.

 

"Yes, this is it," Daehwi said while drawing two short straight lines and finally, a slightly longer curved line.

 

"Lee Daehwi's signature," he announced. He had drawn a happy face.

 

He looked up, and saw Jinyoung smiling brightly at him, definitely contented at his answer. Jinyoung looked down at their interlocked hands, and then at Daehwi again.

 

"Look at this closely," he instructed, his voice firm and steady. Daehwi did as he was told.

 

Jinyoung lifted his free index finger, and began tracing more words: this time round, it is on the back of Daehwi's hand.

 

'Me too' it read. Jinyoung looked intently at Daehwi, waiting for his response.

 

Daehwi didn't reply, but he faced Jinyoung and smiled.

 

"Daehwi-ah," Jinyoung said, his heart beating fast as he was getting really nervous.

 

"Hm?" Daehwi replied upon hearing his name.

 

"Open your mouth."

 

"Why?"

 

"Just open it. Just a little."

 

"Like this?"

 

"Smaller. Unless you prefer it like this."

 

"Huh?"

 

 Jinyoung lightly grabbed Daehwi's chin, and leaned close. So close that their noses were touching. Every breath of Jinyoung could be felt on Daehwi's lips, bringing a tingling sensation throughout his body.

 

Daehwi closed his eyes, half expectant of what was coming. And half, just enjoying Jinyoung's presence. Jinyoung's touch. Jinyoung's breath.

 

 Jinyoung sensed that Daehwi was ready and leaned in further to kiss him. Their lips touch, lightly.

 

Jinyoung was thrilled knowing that Daehwi was responding well to his actions, and he was surprisingly good for a first timer.

 

 Daehwi on the other hand, was unsure if what he was doing was satisfying enough for the one he loved, so he just kissed in the way that was comfortable for him.

 

Because loving Bae Jinyoung would never be a chore for him, and he made sure it was always like that.

 

Being stuck in their own world, they totally forgot about their group mates who were still in the living room, and could have seen anything that was going on, at any time.

 

"Guys, I think we shall give them some private space," Jisung announced. He dragged all of them away from the glass doors, and drew the curtains to the balcony.

 

“Congratulations, guys,” Jisung uttered softly with a motherly smile. 

 

Together with Sungwoon, they went to join Minhyun and Jaehwan at the couch, stealing their popcorn. The pink Sausages went back to their room, most probably started some random Kung-Fu fighting again.

 

Jinyoung's hand reached for Daehwi's, and their fingers interlock naturally.

 

Jinyoung lightly pulled away from him, and Daehwi looked back with a warm smile.

 

"Daehwi, if there's anything wrong, just tell me. It's okay. I'm your boyfriend, and I'm here for you," Jinyoung spoke in a sincere tone.

 

He looked at Jinyoung for a second and then looked down again. After a few moments, he looked up at him again, his eyes meeting his concerned gaze.

 

"I miss my father," Daehwi said, looking away.

 

"While I was in the shower, I suddenly thought about him. How he used to bathe for me when I was a child. How he scolded me for pouring soap on the floor. These simple things. The happy times we spent together. I miss him," he continued.

 

By then, he was on the verge of crying.

 

Jinyoung's free hand reached for Daehwi's back, guiding him to his chest, giving him a warm embrace.

 

"Daehwi, just cry if you feel sad. I know you miss him, of course you would. You always talked fondly of him," Jinyoung assured him, as tears flowed down Daehwi's cheeks, wetting the whole area around Jinyoung's shirt.

 

Jinyoung decided to keep quiet while Daehwi continued sobbing into his arms. In this situation, letting it all out was the best solution, so he decided to let Daehwi be.

 

It took a while before Daehwi finally got up from Jinyoung's arms. His arms were already aching, but he would not ask Daehwi to get up because he knew that his embrace would be the best help to Daehwi.

 

"Daehwi, are you okay?" Jinyoung asked with a small smile.

 

"Mhm hyung. I feel much better now after your hug!" Daehwi exclaimed, a smile slowly forming on his face.

 

Jinyoung gave him a reassuring smile.

 

"Daehwi, you're really important to me, and I really hope that you’re happy.  Letting out your emotions will help you a lot, and I hope to be beside you in these situations," Jinyoung said, “so always find me when you’re sad, okay? I’ll make sure you leave with a smile.”

 

Daehwi nodded with a smile, “mhm!”

 

Holding Daehwi’s hand tightly, Jinyoung pulled him back to the living room.

 

"It’s quite late already and we have an early flight tomorrow. It’s time to sleep! Everyone, it’s time to sleep!” Jinyoung announced to all the members in the room as they all get ready for bed.

 

”Sleep well, Daehwi,” Jinyoung whispered.

 

”You too, Bae Jinyoung,” he replied as they smiled at each other.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this work! :)


End file.
